


September 11th

by romeoandjulietyouwish



Series: Lis Writes 9-1-1 [16]
Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flashbacks, Gen, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Owen Strand is a Good Dad, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Worried TK Strand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24563050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romeoandjulietyouwish/pseuds/romeoandjulietyouwish
Summary: September 11th brings back some bad memories for Owen.Prompt: I'm curious what would be your take on Owen + 9/11 PTSD and TK
Relationships: Owen Strand & TK Strand
Series: Lis Writes 9-1-1 [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1725208
Comments: 8
Kudos: 100





	September 11th

**Author's Note:**

> I did a little research on first responders’ PTSD after 9/11 and I tried to be as accurate as possible.

September 11 is the hardest day of the year for Owen. Every year on the anniversary, he finds that every little thing makes him think of his crew, the crew he couldn’t save. 

He remembers the way Donovan used to make a killer breakfast burrito, Jensen was the only one who could beat him at chess, Samuel kept a picture of his family in his turnout coat, Lee used to hum while cleaning the trucks, Davidson was the only one who could make the crew smile after a rough call, and Jones was the closest thing Owen ever had to a brother. 

And they’re all gone. 

Owen spends the eleventh the same way every year: he wakes up early and goes to church, lighting a candle for every member of his crew that lost their life on ground zero. He then goes to the station and does a little tidying up, just to be around his crew. After that, he doesn’t know what to do with himself. Sometimes he just stares at the wall blankly until TK comes and forces food down his throat. Sometimes he’ll hear a plane flying low and he won’t be able to drag himself out of the memories that flood his brain. And sometimes he takes a sleeping pill and knocks himself out for the rest of the day. 

It’s September eleventh for the first time since they moved to Austin. Owen wakes up feeling a thrum of anxiety in his chest. But he ignores it and numbly pulls himself out of bed to get dressed. In the kitchen he finds TK standing over the stove making pancakes. His son looks up at him with a sad smile as he pushes the plate towards him. 

“Eat up.” 

Owen ruffles his hair, “Thanks, kid.” 

As TK starts to eat his own breakfast he asks, “Are you going to church?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Do you want me to come with you?” TK asks every year. He’s gone with Owen a few times, but it’s been a few years since. 

Owen shakes his head, “You have a shift. I’ll be fine. I’ll stop by the station later to see everyone.” 

“You’ll call me if you need anything, right?” TK asks. 

“Of course,” Owen says. It’s not true. Owen hates relying on his son, it’s supposed to be the other way around. TK shouldn’t have to take care of him. “You better get going, huh?” 

TK checks his watch, “Yeah.” Giving his dad a quick hug, he says, “Love you.” 

“Love you too, kid.” 

After TK leaves and Owen has finished his breakfast. Owen pulls himself out of the chair and into his car. Austin has no shortage of churches, but Owen is partial to Grace and Judd’s church. He’s not much of a churchgoer, but today is the one day of the year that turns Owen into just as much of a godfearing man as the rest of Texas.

Once inside the church, Owen kneels, and quietly whispers the names of each person as he lights the candle for them. Once he’s done and about to begin prayer, he feels a hand on his shoulder and looks up to see the pastor behind him. 

“May I pray with you?” He asks. 

Owen nods and the pastor kneels down beside him and begins to lead Owen through the familiar prayer. 

“In the lord’s name, amen.”

“Amen,” Owen repeats. “Thank you, father.” 

The pastor smiles at him, “Judd told me to expect you today, it’s the least I can do.”

Owen smiles sadly. Of course the cowboy did. As much as Judd pretends, he’s really just a big softie. Owen thanks the pastor once more and heads to the station.

At the station, Mateo is the first to notice him from where he is working on top of the truck. Without saying anything, he jumps off the truck and hugs Owen tightly. Owen smiles and squeezes him back, “Thanks.” 

Mateo smiles and steps aside to let Owen walk further in. 

“Hey, cap.” Owen looks to where Marjan and Paul are walking down the stairs. “Didn’t expect to see you today,” Marjan remarks. 

He shrugs, “I just wanted to check in on you guys.” 

“We should be doing that for you,” Paul points out. “Are you doing okay?”

“As good as I can be,” Owen claps Paul on the shoulder with a ghost of a smile.

“We’re here for you, man, anything you need,” Judd promises having walked in from the lounge. 

“Thanks, Judd.” Owen smiles at the cowboy and looks around. “Do you know where my kid’s at?” Owen asks. 

“Uh, yeah, I think he’s in the kitchen.” 

Owen thanks Judd and walks to find TK who, just as Judd said is in the kitchen, grabbing a mug from the cabinet.

“Hey,” Owen alerts TK to his presence. His son turns around and smiles upon seeing his dad.

“How was church?” TK asks as he sets down the mug.

“It was nice, quieter than the ones in New York.” Owen leans back against the counter as his son starts to brew himself a cup of coffee. “Judd told the pastor I would be stopping by, it was nice to have him with me I guess.” 

“I can believe that. So what’s next? Are you heading home or...”

TK’s words fade away to background noise as the grinding of the coffee maker becomes louder and louder to Owen. He blinks slowly and suddenly he’s not in Texas anymore. 

_ “Haven’t you already had two cups?” Davidson teases, snatching the cup from Owen’s hands. “And you didn’t make me a single one? That’s cold.”  _

_ Owen rolls his eyes and takes the mug back, “You are perfectly capable of making your own cup.”  _

_ “Nah, I don’t think he is,” Lee laughs as he cuts up an apple. “I mean he has yet to learn how to properly put away his uniform-” _

_ “That was one time!” Davidson shouts. “Give a guy a break!” _

_ “No,” Owen gestures to Lee, “he’s got a point. I think the probie is sick of cleaning up after you.”  _

_ “You’re darn right I am,” Jensen says. _

_ “Okay, okay,” Owen mediates with a smile. “Look-” _

_ “Holy shit!” Jones exclaims from the other room. “Cap! Guys! You gotta see this! A plane just crashed into the World Trade Center!” _

_ Feet pound on concrete. Screams and cries and sirens are all around him.  _

Owen is frozen, his heart echoes loudly in his ears, his lungs strain for air. 

“Dad, you’re safe. We’re in Texas at the station. You’re okay. We’re okay.” Owen distantly realizes that TK is kneeling on the ground in front of him, holding his hands tight. “Can you hear me?” Owen nods and hears TK exhale in relief, “Can you squeeze my hand?” Owen does. “Good, okay, you need to breathe. We’re at the 126. Everyone is safe. I’m right here.”

Owen takes his hand out of TK’s to wrap it around his son’s wrist, feeling the strong pulse there. 

“Dad?”

He closes his eyes and takes a long breath. “I’m okay?” Owen tells him. “I’m okay.” 

Wordlessly, TK wraps his arms around his dad and hugs him tight. “That was a pretty bad one, huh?” 

Owen shakes his head, “I’ve had worse.” Sometimes he watches his crew die over and over, sometimes he’s at their funerals, sometimes he’s telling their families, and sometimes it’s just happy memories. Memories are all he has left of them now.

“Do you want me to take you home?” TK asks, looking over him.

“I’m fine. You have to work.”

“No, he doesn’t.” Owen looks up to see Judd watching him from across the room, the rest of the crew behind him. “I called in replacements, go home, Strand. We’re okay here.”

“Thanks,” TK says and helps his dad to his feet. Owen lets his kid lead him out of the station, Judd squeezes his shoulder as he walks by. 

When they’re in the car, Owen turns to his son, “Thank you for that.” 

TK smiles at him, “Of course, you’d do it for me.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Comment and kudos keep me writing!
> 
> Tumblr- @evanbuckley-heartofgold


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